Brandon Roy says he knew it was just a matter of time: 'I have to think about my family'

At first, he felt the knees. Then, Brandon Roy heard them.

It was last week, days before training camp was to start for the Portland Trail Blazers, and Roy was intensifying his efforts to come back from yet another round of knee surgeries the season before.

His workouts, casual and playful during the lockout, became serious and strenuous, just like they always did as he prepared for a season during his storied career.

He was determined to make a comeback. To prove people wrong. To prove that the people who were standing by him were right.

But something wasn't right. And he knew it.

"The more I would try to prepare to have this big comeback year, the worse my knees would continue to feel," Roy said Thursday in his first public comments since July. "As we approached training camp, there was clicking in there, there was something in there really bothering me, and I was starting to feel like I would have to have another (surgery) just to help me get by day-to-day."

Days earlier he had met with the Trail Blazers' brass: president Larry Miller, interim general manager Chad Buchanan and head coach Nate McMillan. And later he would talk with owner Paul Allen. They all made his heart swell with unyielding support.

But deep down, he knew about his aches. And he knew about the clicks.

"The Blazers were supporting me 110 percent, and it made me feel that if they could give me that much support, then I had to be 100 percent honest about how I was feeling," Roy said. "I felt I owed it to the organization to be as honest as possible."

He scheduled an appointment with team orthopedist Don Roberts, who over the years Roy said had become more than just a doctor, but also a friend.

"I didn't tell anyone else," Roy said. "I wanted to ask questions; I wanted to get answers. And he gave me answers about what he truly felt -- not as the Trail Blazers' doctor, but as a friend of mine who knows my knees more than anybody."

The answer would alter the course of Trail Blazers history.

"I don't want to put words in his mouth, but he told me I was finished playing basketball," Roy said.

That night, Roy called the Blazers and told them his career was over. He would seek medical retirement because of a career-ending injury.

It had been one week since Brandon Roy heard those words, and yet, he still hadn't repeated them until Thursday.

"When I say it, career-ending ... it's hard," Roy said, his voice cracking. "Ever since middle school ... you want to be the best player, and to know that dream of aiming to be the best is over, it's tough. Very tough."

The Blazers on Thursday waived Roy, using the NBA's newly instituted amnesty clause, which allows teams to wipe a contract off the books. Roy will be paid the remaining $63 million left on his contract, but none of it will count against the Blazers' salary cap. As a result, the Blazers were eligible for more free agent money, which they used Thursday to sign high-scoring Jamal Crawford, one of Roy's closest friends.

He says he is at peace with the Blazers' decision, and pleased that the move enabled them to sign a quality player like Crawford.

"I've been drooling to play with Jamal; the timing just wasn't right," Roy said. "But Portland will love him."

Roy said he would never play again. Not this year. Not next year. Not five years down the road. In the background, his 4-year-old son Brandon Jr. and 2-year old daughter Mariah are audible, and he adjusts the phone to tend to them.

"As much as I want to prove right that one guy who says I still have something in the tank, I have to think about my family and what the doctor is telling me," Roy said.